When They Start Taking Requests from Beyond the Grave
Friday, September 5th, 2014Requests will be granted as follows:
1. Imagineers John Hench and Marc Davis will design and oversee the making of my very own Jungle Room.
Disneyland restaurant concept art by John Hench
John Hench’s concept art for Disney’s Enchanted Tiki Room
Marc Davis’ concept art for Disney’s Enchanted Tiki Room
2. Charles McPhee will paint Dr. Jacoby on black velvet for my Jungle Room:
3. Amy Winehouse will cover Barbara Dane’s “I’m On My Way” dressed in leopard print for the grand unveiling of my Jungle Room to myself and possibly a few others:
It will look as if Amy has materialized from my Witco barstool because it’s covered in the same leopard print:
A Witco bar set
Before she sings she’ll ask for a strong kava drink. She likes what it does to her voice. I will have a vat prepared for just such an occasion, this being my fantasy, and serve it up in a sedate Mr. Bali Hai tiki mug. I will tell her to drink it down all at once. Fast. She’ll say yeah, she knows, she loves the stuff, and it’s only then that I’ll notice that a giant tiare flower has sprouted from her beehive.
Mr. Bali Hai
4. Henry Mancini will persistently but respectfully appear to Abe Laboriel in his dreams and convince him to perform the bass solo from Mancini’s arrangement of “Barretta’s Theme” in my Jungle Room, under the glow of neon swampfire.
5. Stanley Kubrick will direct the as yet unwritten screen adaptation of Jack Vance’s Abercrombie Station. Not in my Jungle Room. There’s no place for a Jungle Room in the film.